It baffles me how oddly my mind works. There are days, months ago, when I could not go an hour without rambling about everything and nothing. Here I am, months later, with almost nothing to say. How can I possibly go from overwhelmingly large amounts of inner dialogue to absolutely nothing at all?
I'm able to find minimal solace in my current state. Although it's a tad refreshing to not feel, think, ponder anything for hours on end after spending eleven months questioning everyone and everything, I worry that perhaps my heart's just a shriveled, dried-up mess. My care and passion for that and those in my life extinguished. Terrifying to believe that I've fallen into complete and utter apathy.
So now I ask you this, oh great world. If you believe yourself to be as great for holding the pleasures of the human race so simply in the palm of your hand, why can I not find the peace that I so pondered on and hoped for those eleven months when I had a heart? Don't give me your narcotics. Don't give me your liquor. Give me my peace.
... And maybe a martini.
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Minor Fall
about
- The Humansong
- A song sung to convince someone to love you... Every humansong is as unique as a fingerprint. When you open a window in the spring, the air is sometimes filled with them. --Nicole Krauss